Hurrah!

In an effort to avoid working (I really must stop doing that) I have looked again at my final year project summary sheet - and it's so much better than I thought it would be! One of the exciting things is that I have to read a 200-page book about the Human Genome Project. I know. Isn't it fabulous? Well I think it is, it looks like a popular science book rather than a book written by people who are really knowledgeable about Biology, like me :-P I'm sure I'll get really sick of all the reading after a while but once I've done it I'll feel like I've achieved something, which isn't a feeling I've experienced very often on this course. Also in my 30 minute seminar it says I have to do a practical demonstration, which I didn't look into too much and thought it meant a proper lab demonstration being the silly person I am. BUT all I have to do is show people how to use the online databases. Hurrah! I'm even starting to get enthusiastic about the whole thing (this will wear off). Now I';m going to my Protein Targeting lecture. The lecturer is Caroline Quentin so I must not be late :-).

Name that shoe!

I am procrastinating and so I have decided to name some of my shoes after characters in Neighbours.

• Lyn Scully - My brown boots, because they are old and in need of a polish. And they steal from the Coffee Shop.
• Sindi Watts - My pink sparkly pointy shoes, because they are girly. And because they were once a stripper in a club in Australia.
• Summer/Izzy Hoyland (I couldn't decide) - My flat red shoes, because they could quite easily be worn by a young child, and they are bitches in that they cut my feet up every time I wear them. Also they were pregnant with Gus's baby but recently miscarried.
• Liljana Bishop - my black boots, because they are older than they look and because they look like a racoon with long hair.
• Harold Bishop - My black sandals with diamante bee because they can play the tuba and disgust everyone when they talk about sex.
• Serena Bishop and Luka Dokich - My new black sequin-y shoes and my skechers, because they had an incestuous relationship together.

I invite you to name your pairs of shoes (or pair for Ciaran) after your favourite soap characters.

Confusementation and general annoyance

I am in one of those moods where I feel like there is loads to do but I'm just too tired and drained to do it. I got my final year project sheet back today, and it looks much less suited to me than I thought it was. I think I'll find it dull and hard. That and other things. So basically, waaaaah. However, as I do not feel that a blog - well, my blog anyway - is a place for moping-like language, I will try my best not to depress you all. Who knows, it might even cheer me up.

I went to a PGCE open day yesterday and it has made me think that either of the following is true:

1. I am not going to get onto the course and if I do I will hate it because of the long hours and the fact that I am rubbish at standing up and talking in front of people.
2. I want to be a teacher and it would be really good for me to do the course because it would change me for the better as a person.

What's a penguin to do? It's madness, it's carpets, it's carpet madness! We went to this school where a lot of the Warwick PGCE lesson observations are done and they had a special room with live video footage from a nearby classroom, so we could watch what was going on in the lesson. It doesn't sound that exciting, but it was quite strange to think that could be me in about a year and a half, and watching what happened was really interesting. Oh I don't know. I wish I was a potato, then I'd have nothing at all to worry about.

A Sad Little Story

Recent sources (that I will not mention ;-)) have led me to short story/poem writing. I.e. I am bored and supposed to be at SSLC, but let's gloss over that. So here goes...

There were once some gnus
Who loved to make shoes
They wore plastic aprons
And nothing rhymes with aprons.

They used all kinds of things
From leather to strings
So the children could play
In the garden all day
Hip hip hooray!

Everyone loved the gnus
But one day they all died.

The end.

Dilemma

Ok so there's this chicken right, and he loves chips. In fact he would choose chips over daddy any day. He goes to this restaurant with his friends (who aren't chickens) and he really wants to get some chips. Why? Because he loves them. BUT, and here comes the dilemma, the only thing they have with chips in it is Chicken and Chips Extravaganza. There are no side orders of chips, but if he chose the Chicken and Chips Extravaganza, his friends would call him Cannibal Keith. Now bear in mind that this chicken needs chips like he needs chicken feed, which is a lot.

Does he eat the Chicken and Chips Extravaganza, risking ridicule and having to live with the knowledge that he's consumed one of his friends (cos all chickens are friends with all other chickens) or does he have pizza instead and have a terrible night out?

The Learning Triangle

http://www.somethingawful.com/learning_triangle/index.htm

Ooh, yummy pizza goodness (discuss)

I am waiting for my Goodfellas four cheese pizza to cook so I can enjoy its melted-cheese-y loveliness while I watch Neighbours, hoho. May I just take this opportunity to pay homage to the wonder that is the Pizza Hut Chicken Feast (deep pan of course)? It annoys me quite a lot that there is no three cheese/chicken combo equivalent pizza in the shops, as I love it so. "Kylie, why don't you just take a four cheese pizza and sprinkle roast chicken pieces over it, thus creating a pizza of chickeny cheesy delight just like that you so adore at Pizza Hut?" I hear you cry. Well, there are three answers: 1) I can't be bothered to cut up chicken, 2) chicken is expensive and 3) it wouldn't be the same, you silly people! Also, there are those that believe in a superiority of Pizza Express over Pizza Hut - I tell them they are WRONG as the day is LONG. Pizza Express does not have a chicken feast equivalent, is more expensive and does not do deep pan pizzas. So that's that cleared up, I'm going to get my pizza out of the oven.

Hello hello

Hello, it is me.

I am hoping that the few people who read my blog have not given up on me due to my lack of internet. Anyway for those people still with me, I hope you had a magnificent and tremendous Christmas/New Year. The bad news is that the neighbour we thought was dead came back over Christmas, although so far he hasn't kept me awake with Radio Leicester like he did for the few weeks he was there at the start of last term. Ok that might all have sounded a bit mean, but I don't actually want him to die. I just want him to go away. He can stay there over the holidays when I'm not living here, but he should be elsewhere at all other times. That's not too much to ask is it?

At home in Leicester the people who run the brothel next door left for a few days, and then the police came to us to say they were monitoring the house in case they came back and changing the locks. Then the pimps and whores returned and waited in their car outside (presumably because they couldn't get in hehehe) and we rang the police, it was all very exciting like an exciting film or some other exciting thing. The brothel people left the car before the police could arrive but the next time we looked there were police cars parked outside the house and the brothel car had gone, woooh.

So in conclusion my recent experiences have been slightly bonkers.