Le weekend

Qu'est-ce que tu as fait au weekend, Kylie? Alors, je vais te tell maintenant. En francais in parts. Mal francais avec bad grammar et pas de accents. So there. Geddoverit, spoons.

Vendredi

J'ai done lots of fencing with mon new friend, Salamander Bruce. He bought me a new sword thing so I decided to try it out. ON HIS SALAMANDER BRAINS, MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!


He deeeead now. RIP Bruce.

It's his own fault for changing colour like a crazy colour-changing lizard. Freak.

Samedi

LORDY LORDY LOO
I made a pointy shoe. For you. And a gnu. Woohoo. Just the one thooooough.

Buckaroo.
Dimanche

I danced in the morning when the world was young


- I'm older than I look. That's me there on the left.


I danced in the moon and the stars and the sun

- that was quite a challenge. They're quite far apart from each other and the last two are a bit balmy.


I came down from heaven and I danced on the earth

- I parachuted.


At Bethlehem I had my birth

- Which is a lie. I was born in Leicester Royal Infirmary.


I danced for the scribes and the Pharisees

- They needed someone at short notice. Jill Halfpenny cancelled on them.


They wouldn't dance, they wouldn't follow me

- They're dead now so it might have been a bit much to expect anything more.


I danced for the fishermen James and John
They came with me so the dance went on

- Nice blokes. They gave me a free trout.


I danced on the Sabbath and I cured the lame

- Oh yeah, go me.


The holy people said it was a shame

- They must have been in the wheelchair business.


They ripped, they stripped, they hung me high


- There they are. They were Full Monty holy people from a BDSM cult.


Left me there on the cross to die

- Bastards.


Then I did a blog post. This is she. Her name is Petunia. Petunia Ripplemoose.

Bacon lardons.